A Top Ten
List for
The following is
a blatant ripoff of David Letterman’s Top Ten Lists,
provided for your amusement and hoping that it will get someone’s attention.
At this moment, it’s Memorial Day weekend, and great multitudes of humans
are headed for vacation trips or just getting away for the weekend. I’m going on vacation in 12 days (…2 hours,
37 minutes, and 4 seconds….tick, tick, tick) so I thought I’d have a vacation
themed list.
And now, from the
Home Office in Buffalo Prairie,
“Top Ten
Signs that you’ve been on a driving vacation for too long”:
10. You sit in an
easy chair and your left arm instinctively reaches for a steering wheel tilt
adjustment lever.
9. You’ve removed
the gas cap on your car three states ago to speed up the gas station visits.
8. A state
trooper pulls you over and says, “Oh, YOU again?”
7. You shudder in
fear when you hear “I-70” and “
6. Not only do
you drive, eat, and talk on the cell phone all at the same time, you start to
wonder “why doesn’t everyone?”
5. If it’s not a
photo op or bursting bladder, you ain’t stoppin’!
4. You can
actually find places where you CAN’T get Rush Limbaugh on the radio.
3. When you see a
hitchhiker, you automatically think to yourself, “20 points?”
2. You panic at
the sight of a Ford Crown
And the Number
One sign that you’ve been on a driving vacation too long?
(scroll down)
1. You can eat
anything from Taco Bell in your car without spilling it!
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